Who is Inkley Tolew III Esquire?

I have been getting numerous emails as to the identity of Inkley Tolew the Third Esquire.
While this is a short post, this will hopefully clear the mirk surrounding the odd contribution from this strange fellow.
Inkley is the Exploratory Commanding Editor at Large for the Wormwood Valley Newspaper, sometimes known as the Wormwood Valley Daily, the Wormwood Daily, the Wormwood Occasional Chronicle, and even the Wormwood Wire Service. Most in Wormwood Valley, however, simply refer to it as, 'the Paper.'

Inkley is a distinguished member of the Wormwood Valley Historical Society, the Wormwood Order of the Silver Dragon, and an Explorer of the Third Degree in the Wormwood Explorers Club, although the mere existence of such a club is, of course, just here-say.

Soem have questioned wether Inkley is human at all, and that, as far as I know, remains to be determined by the Wormwood Valley Council on Genealogical Lineage.

 He can occasionally be seen tending the gaming bar or the shelves of the Wormwood Valley Hardware and Esoteric Supply store, managed by Sir Finneus McShrinks. He answers all emails at inkleytolewIIIEsq@gmail.com.

I have yet to capture a photo of Inkley while visiting Wormwood, as he is not a fan of traditional film cameras, nor is he much in favor of digital media. I am working on acquiring a photo by way of a turn-of-the-century Hasselblad which he did not, during my last visit, seem completely opposed to.

I hope this has at least answered a few of the questions I have thus far received. I apologize if my answers seem somewhat vague. I do wish to respect Inkley's wishes, and the wishes of the Wormwood Valley Council for privacy both of their citizens and their location. I have taken the liberty to address specific emails with answers only listed here chronologically.




Mellisa M: No, he prefers Earl Grey, but thats a great suggestion. I will share that with him when we meet next.

John S: Yes, plenty of times. Although I have yet to find a proper publishing house for this nonsense here in the real world. Thank you for the consideration and concern. Sorry about the parakeet.

AndygdaneE: Wow. Not sure how to respond.

Alfred Cummings: I wish I knew.

C. Aurora: Of course! I'm sure he would love that. Thank you for the sweet words of encouragement.

Daggerbreath: Doubtful. He hates bad drivers.

Ricky G: 13. Or perhaps 4, depending on who you ask in Wormwood.

Taylor: I don't think it's so much that he hates them, as he just can't stand their mediocrity and boring nature. Especially when mixed with such an air of pompous superiority.

S. N: He believes you simply do not have skin thick enough for the journey.

Bingo: He would gladly share a round with you, preferably burnt black and crusted with age. good luck with the Barbies. Stay away from pom-poms.